When habits become patterns they also become tradition. Whether it’s lechon on Noche Buena, or our aunt leaving a giant lipstick stamp on our cheek, tradition comes in many forms during the holidays.
The pattern of the Ego is no different. And a reliance on what’s consistent and easy, can create a tradition to constantly feel insecure.
Our January book club book is Ryan Holiday’s book Ego is the Enemy and as I’ve been reading ahead (nerd alert!), I’ve noticed the lengths people will reach to placate their Egos. Egos are hungry for validation. The more you feed it the larger it grows.
This feeding system encourages people to create all sorts of internal stories in order to satisfy their hunger.
We all have Egos. No one is innocent here!
And being self-aware of the Ego is crucial to breaking patterns in order to grow. Remember, Ego is the opposite of confidence.
Confidence doesn’t need adulation or validation.
According to Ryan Holiday, “confidence is based on what is real—it is earned. Ego is based on delusion and wishful thinking—it is artifice.”
Confidence allows us to relate to others because confidence banishes insecurity and fear. It also allows us to live without internal conflict and conflict with others. This is called inner peace.
“Peace on Earth,” is what holiday music is all about, but practicing peace gives it new meaning. Letting go of the Ego is a great first step to finding a new tradition.
This holiday, I hope you will be confidently conscious, generously kind, but more importantly courageously humble.
And know that our tradition to seek each other will never change… because as always, I’m nothing without you.